Round 4 Magazine
Welcome to Round 4 Mag people. This was a solid week, and I was able to make the Top Punches longer than it's been all season, so that's a step in the right direction. We got some excellent matchups happening this week and should make for a dope round. Let's take a look:
Round 3
Reviews
Barcotic vs Killing Spree
Glad to see Bar didn't include nude paintings in his punch this week, I was a little worried about the guy. This battle was okay but I think Killing Spree dropped the ball here. Isreal works as wordplay contrary to what @Amen thinks. But regardless, you didn't tie it in nicely or effectively. I don't even know what you mean by telling him that he's gonna be a zip or a missing body lol. What is a zip in the context you intended? Barcotic's bar was cool n although killer instinct is played he was able to make a fresh twist and take this battle comfortably.
Jonny Blaze vs Chrit.
This battle had a surprising outcome, to say the least. Chrit. May have been sleeping on blaze expecting an easy win, and if that's the case it cost him the match. B's merch/besmirch the league works by itself but using a single letter doesn't sit well with some voters. For me it was the fact that merchandise had nothing to do with jonny and didn't tie in with the rest of the punch. Jonny managed to tie in 2 personal angles which augmented his punch significantly. The gym/bite concept worked well, and although wording could have been tweaked for more effect he still came out with the win and rightfully so.
Enbombz vs Revelation 18:3
What can we say about this battle... Enbombz had a super forced wordplay (reverse RE verse? When his name is Rev not reeve) and Revelation had a weird simile punch that didn't tie in together. Also fiend is a noun so from a grammatical standpoint it does not work at all. This battle probably could have gone either way but I think enbomb deserved it for at least attempting a nameplay. Not impressed with you 2 this week, hopefully we see some progress moving into the next week.
it am jeshka vs Nahlidge
I had issues with the way nahlidge worded his first line (time to trim the fat, Albert this bitch....). Not sure how the albert works there and I'm pretty sure it doesn't. Also didn't like the “hit her with three heys”. Although it works from the albert side I don't see how it works as anything else. Jeshka had an okay punch with a failure at heart/Nancy Reagan concept and took this battle easily imo.
Smash vs Main Activity vs alphadog
alphadog didn't do any damage here and tried to hard to use wordplay that didn't work. All kinds of stuff wrong with ur punch this week. I dunno what Main meant by “askin for another double” or how it tied in with the rest of his punch. Smash surprised me this week and dropped a solid punch that incorporated both of their names effectively. Good shit Smash.
Letterman vs Fresh
Yeah he got me. I shouldn't have received any votes tbh, but some of you may not have understood the personal aspect of his punch. Letterman you can add a notch on your incredibly small # of battles you've beat me in now. I'm still beating you overall though bitch! Fight me
Aero vs KnowP
I thought this was a nice battle. It was close as fuck in the votes, and considering I had a hard time deciding which bar I liked better this seems to make sense. KnowP's arrowhead I guess is played but I thought he had a nice twist on it and executed it harshly. Aero had an interesting concept and a flip on an idiom. The voters chose in favour of aero in a close one. Good shit both of u though.
Sour Cig vs Allen Knight
Wasn't a huge fan of Sour cig this week. I get the wordplay and I know who nia long is but it just didn't work for me.. Like why does it end with visits from the soul food cast? Not digging it this week, probably a good thing Allen Knight Didn't show up.
Joe Boston vs Fern
Holy shit Joe you wrote a novel lol nah but that shit is stretched to fuck yo. Ur wordplay had potential but had some serious wording issues. For example, instead of saying “so with this brickleberry” just say “so this brickleberry” because it sounds more like brick'll bury than brick, I'll bury. Also missing a word at the end of ur punch... “ then won't hesitate to laugh about (?) right next to daniel tosh” Double check ur shit for grammar before u post you egg headed son of a bitch.
Round 3
Top punches
Barcotic vs Killing Spree
Smash vs Main Activity vs alphadog
Aero vs KnowP
Jonny Blaze vs Chrit.
Letterman vs Fresh
Round 4
Previews and Predictions
By: ILLunatic
Barcotic vs Joe Boston
Barcotic hasn’t been as impressive as he has been in the past and Joe is not one to sleep on. If Mike stays in his “slump”, I can see Joe creeping in and stealing a win. The fact that I’m saying this, I can almost bet that Barcotic will bring the heat and take the win. Potential battle of the week.
Barcotic 55/45
Chrit. vs Sour Cig
Old School vs New School. If this was 2000 I would say Chrit has this in the bag, but the fact that it’s 2016 (makes you feel old doesn’t it Ryan) I’m obligated to say that Cig will maintain his unblemished record. Potential battle of the week.
Sour Cig 60/40
Jonny Blaze vs Revelation 18:3
Lenox has had some tough opponents the past couple of rounds and honestly, I see this being his easiest one. With that being said, he better not slack and get caught here.
Lenox 80/20
Enbombz vs Nahlidge
Another new school vs old school battle that has potential. Nahlidge has been the No Show monster slayer since Season 25 started. Enbombz is no one to take lightly and should finally give Nahlidge something to put up for.
Enbombz 70/30
It am Jeshka vs Letterman
Zelph’s alter ego has been sliding by all Season and finally finds his way to the wannabe jock, Letterman. Letterman, bring that real shit… not the re-written, 15th different execution bullshit and stop this man in his tracks…
Letterman 70/30
Smash vs Slecht
I always want to think Slecht is a vet but nothing he’s ever done stands out to me. Smash is up and down but has shown he can throw together a punch, but also has shown he can deliver an impact of baby powder without the smack. This is a toss up here
Smash 55/45
Main Activity vs Packed Graves
There’s no question that PG is a monster, but the wild card here will be rust factor. It’s been a minute since I’ve seen PG drop a bar so I’m going to wait patiently in anticipation here.
Packed Graves 70/30
Alphadog vs Aero
Lets face it, things haven’t been going Aero’s way so far. He initially signed out but respectfully stayed in to prevent a 3 way this round. Alpha… I hope you do your homework and bring this man some competition or else it’s going to be a slaughterhouse.
Aero 80/20
KnowP vs Fresh
Another potential Battle of the Week if these two come swinging like they were once capable of doing. Both have fell off over the past year or so, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t put on a good show.
Fresh 60/40
This weeks WTF's
WTF @ Jonny Blaze dropping a nice punch and beating Chrit.?
WTF @ Aero finding a loophole in battle etiquette with his sig this week
WTF @ Letterman finally beating me (*waits for Letterman to post angry rant*)
WTF @ slecht voting for alphadog instead of smash last round???
WTF @ Allen Knight no showing? Oh wait that's normal, this doesn't belong here.
WTF @ this mag being late
WTF @ Packed Graves coming back from the dead
WTF @ me getting votes in a battle I should have lost when usually I get no votes in battles I should win
WTF
Outro
That's it mothafucka's! Outro's are pointless and I doubt any of you are actually going to read this but if you are reading this, just know that deep down I think you're a bitch.