Choking The Clown by: Alphabetized & Ending

[The Ending.]

So many people like it, why can't we get mroe feedback?

[Makeshyft.]

You had emotion in this i understood the story without having to re-read it.
Imagery was good overall.
The complexity of the vocabulary wasn't the best but you guys pulled it off.
overall this was def a good peice definetly

[The Ending.]

Thankyou.

[Soule]

Feedback now!

[Soule]

Feedback,
give links.

[B.Nesse]

dammit, i love this shit. lol. first of all, the concept was original and i didn't expect that kind of ending, caught me off guard which is always a good thing in writtens. alpha started it off real smooth, basically reminiscin on shit, like high school days, that gave the story some life so it wasn't dry. his verse was good, he had minor wording issues in some areas but for the most part, i have no real complaints. the ending, wow...your shit was reallllllllllllllllly good. i love how you twisted the story, blended in real well with alpha's verse. and that line Menace quoted did stand out the most in your verse, comparing his death to baseball...and then you were babe ruth, that shit was just genius to me. nice reference. overall, the piece was well worth the read and shit 9/10

h0ller.

[Alphabetized]

Word up appreciate the feed Ness.

[Soule]

Thankyou very much babe, that is like the best, happ feedback I have ever received lol.

[Chris Black]

This has had 11 ups. Edit into one of your posts, links to six pieces you've replied to and an additional link for every time you post in this thread, Belligerant. I'll give you 24 hours to get your links.

[Soule]

Can I have an extintion? I need it because I msut get off now. PLEASE bro.

[Chris Black]

Post 7 links in the next 48 hours.

[B.Nesse]

Thankyou very much babe, that is like the best, happ feedback I have ever received lol.

[Chris Black]

^Don't make bullshit posts like that. I just warnned about too many ups.

PM me the links.

Closed.