"above the clouds"

[3rd dimension]

My soul
is a device for eternal potraits
playing a part inside of me
like internal organs
Life is like
a live camera
zoomed in motion
all you gotta do is stop
aim and focus
Your mind
should always be like a
hospital door is
no matter
the circumstance
it should always remain open
And if you ever oneday
learn to live
your life devoted
new perspective
will ignite your mind
to shine bright inexplosive
just like erupting
volcano forces
And help strike light
within your eyes and soul
like olympic torches
so u can oneday
concieve the motives
to create a motion
that'll have truth
flowing through your blood
like h2o in the pacific ocean
and personally to me
that's what i
see important

[Lock-Down]

yo i like it but ur lines were too short and u need to work oon ur vocab but it was good keep it up homie aight 1

[EyeBite]

DAMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN, the lines were way tooo short! thats the first thing i noticed, the topic seemed to be interesting but the way you supported in those short lines ruined it, rhymes were ok, not really good, complexity and vocab wasn't here man, sorry to say but truth is this was pretty bad no offense, just keep elevating, keep droppin, peace