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Thread: Just one of those days...

  1. #1
    double ya money 2triple0's Avatar
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    Just one of those days...

    Just one of those days...

    Calli doesn't know, is it that hard for a nice writer,
    to hype a drop while he's purchasing a prize fighter
    really quick drop of my own, and if he's not feeling it,
    i won't steal his whip but i'll start riding those wheels of his.
    when i say i know you, you better recognize. keep at it ho.
    got smoke in calli.... he leaves by the door,

    i'm just trying to test it out maybe cuz
    i'm not so used to smoking that purple dust...
    i've known about the haze for a long time,
    but when i'm online i never got rhymes
    eternally pissed off missing people personally...
    verbally cats ripping whatever we feeling internally
    but i always went with someone that i didn't trust,
    Administering a tricky punch while i'm splittin a dutch
    spittin to the rap world becuz i got no other outlet
    rap shit i still don't understand yet...
    maybe it would have been better to name the piece
    something like writing raps while i blaze the trees
    There was more i wanted to say but i got off track
    made the right choice and decided to watch my back
    and at this moment for this contortion
    thats important if you pick things up in one motion
    to a format with a higher level of skill
    that defeat the strategies that the devil instill
    holding up your position in perspective.
    a collective memory finishes this up very effective

    i never seen the hills in Calli
    but rallies work for girls in the valley.
    even if we don't know where this nonsense going....
    i won't have to focus on my conscious knowing
    that GOW will flip that steak before it burns
    agonies and pains, spit back word for word
    gave it time, stayed in line to make a life
    the misery left behind and now we just stay inside
    a friend of mine who's the next in line
    is getting closer to me and i'm in my sexual prime
    my creativity enhanced the theories of relativity
    rolling down the mississippi smoking an L while defying gravity
    crime does pay if you went out and stole for the big time
    I drop at any time like a timed bomb by design...
    Vallus agrees this beat is an interesting read
    composed well even with all the discriminating feed....

    alright you see... maybe i should start
    with the details i'm living in jail with a good heart
    when i start collecting different pieces...
    of relevant sequences that have no equivalent reaches,
    but its difficult as though they're a bunch of insults
    don't have the strength to continue this stuff
    won't ever let the cat out the bag...
    it's not like my life is that fuckin' whack,
    have to unpack i'm starting to feel well...
    verses i read sell and i keep the deal nailed
    down a pipe and into the water just like a slide...
    smoking this bud in a bubble while i ride a bike
    i aint trying to mess everybodies day up
    but name one of those two girls in the same cup.
    and Chris-Poth tempo is over the bar like limbo
    i'm riding in a pinto, baggin' ounces of endo
    Last edited by 2triple0; November 6th, 2009 at 10:47 AM

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  2. #2
    double ya money 2triple0's Avatar
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  3. #3
    catholic schoolgirls rule Sand's Avatar
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    Re: Just one of those days...

    Haha I felt this, I like the way you really put your thoughts into words and put them together in this piece. I could tell that your just flowing rhymes straight from your verbally elevated/ganjated psyche. I felt some of the lines more than others, your vocab was cool, on point.. No complaints. Keep up the writing man, you can put your mind on the paper in a fluid way, that's lightyears ahead of a lot of beginning writers. I think it is one of the most important factors in writing. Learn to put your emotions and observations into the same flow of expression, and you'll turn out some dope work! Keep up the writing, stay real!
    follow me on Instagram @updowndaps

  4. #4
    double ya money 2triple0's Avatar
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    Re: Just one of those days...

    upping this once... did a little bit of editing too so check it out a second time if you've already read it once.

    as always any links are appreciated and will be returned...

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  5. #5
    Pat Blynd's Avatar
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    Re: Just one of those days...

    "alright you see... maybe i should start
    with the details i'm living in jail with a good heart
    when i start collecting different pieces...
    of relevant sequences that have no equivalent reaches"

    ^ Nice sequence right there! I liked the piece as a whole, but within the rap you admitted you were having trouble staying on topic. That's a problem lol. It's a good piece, though, and I like the flow and everything. Just stay on topic and I think you got it down! RTF if you don't mind on my "99 problems" drop
    "A Poem can curve
    Like the bell of a tulip
    Or a pistol grip"
    -Joel Dias-Porter


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