"A Misguided Youth"

[Evolve]

Well done man. You are honestly my hero. I enjoy everything you drop. Everything is always written to near perfection. And there is always some meaning or some type of story that is very entertaining. Respect.

[This Aint Beef]

I do perfer reading stories, there's so much more twists and turns your piece can take. This was based on the topic of 'Misguided Youths'... but it detailed Abu-Musab al-Zarqawi's life story. So the two overlapped in a way.

I really liked the decision to write on this man. I thought he was just some random, notorious terriost who was killed, so the way you presented him was eye opening. The words you chose, and language you used, persuaded me into thinking he wasn't such a bad guy... or atleast gave me understanding into why he WAS such a bad guy.

This was very polished. I really enjoyed your last piece, but I don't think the use of multi's and internal rhymes matches the level you attained for this piece. I'm always amazed at how you are able to use all those multi's, while keeping strictly on topic.

When mother found him kicking stones- “There’s nothing to do,” he would report,
.. Before she smacked him for scuffing the only shoes we could afford.

^ I liked these two lines a lot, because of the use of dialogue. The imagery was really great in this part especially, because I could easily imagine this exchange occuring. The dialogue in the first line is realistic, it's cool you were able to use the multi at the same time. I like how you didn't force the speech in the second line, but I was still able to imagine his mother saying what you implied.

This was a joy to read. Deserving of legends, honestly. I would appreciate feed on -
Water Under the Bridge

[Baron Mynd]

Thank you, everyone. I was beginning to this this board was dead. Lol.

Shout outs to Evo for stopping through! I`ll respond to all of your links when I get a chance, and Eddy- remember to edit your reply in, bi-otch!

Again, thank you for the responses.

Peace!