Crawling

Fetty wap in my nostrils can never stop till I swallow the straw and suck out the rot from the belly of all my monsters can't tell you when I last talked to my son I probably lost him sent crawling back to the hospital bag the product narcotics to hell in the same hand basket baby Moses was swaddled in problems never acknowledged ignore em and keep em bottled in fuck it what is a father when no one raises an eyebrow much less a child and I'm always too high to hear him call for me

Trust means pain pipes crack with pressure
love last forever--
Can't gain back what has come untethered
Lost in the embers---

Burned away with the melting winter my chest is a mess of splinters that stick to the walls of my flesh and prickle like pine needles I shiver and sweat stinking of one-fifty-one liquor my head beats instrumentals so wildly out of rhythm I tried but can't find forgiveness for myself for all my sins rather I wish I could just kill them-- darkened feelings that poke like feelers out from the stitches-- letting go of the lynch pin means losing all of my senses I'm slipping into a pit with the devil and all his children and I don't know if I can crawl back out of it once I'm in it

Trust means pain pipes crack with pressure
love last forever--
Can't gain back what has come untethered
Lost---